The Big 3 is going against the best baller alive since the best baller retired. Everyone knows I'm a self proclaimed Kobe stan, but this series outcome it's just obvious. Especially when The Lake Show has to go against:
Meet The Cast Of This Blockbuster 2008 Remake
Ray Allen as The Cowardly Lion
Grrr Grrr! Big Bad Ray is coming to your town...to go 2 for 7. Roar Roar! The great Jesus Shuttlesworth averaged 26ppg last season...on the Sonics. Put Em Up Put Em Up! TKobe's favorite punching bag has been called on to stop him. "But he plays Kobe hard! He's ready!". If Ray is still Jesus, then Kobe is Denzel. Roar Roaaar! Luckily he doesn't have to do it by himself because he has...
Kevin Garnett as The Tin Man
Garnett is the most talented PF of his time. Then why does Tim Duncan have 4 rings and this is KG's first time in The Finals?
Heart.
He plays like an MVP Candidate for 42 minutes. But as the 4th quarter clock hits that 6 double 0, he's John Q's son. He couldn't do it in his prime with Cassell and Spreewell, so it damn sure aint going down with The Cowardly Lion and...
Paul Pierce as The Scarecrow
Does anyone remember that Paul Pierce played for Boston last year too? 24-58 under his regime? The 18 game losing streak? Sure he has heart and courage. But believe you me he isn't the smartest kid in the class. Who else throws up gang signs in a basketball game? And I don't wanna hear he was reppin Boston. Neither does the David Stern who ordered a $25,000 fine for putting on for his city. Is this the man leading you against the LA MAriano Rivera in the last 6 minutes??? HIM???! Or is your leader....
Doc Rivers as Dorothy The leader of this crazy bunch. Probably the worst head coach to lead his team into an NBA Finals appearance. Well, maybe the 2nd worst. But he thinks he can he thinks he can he thinks he can...
And the couple walked into the house. And they heard strange noises. And these killers started chasing them around the property. And they almost got away. And they were captured. And then...
Feel cheated? Incomplete? That's exactly how The Strangers left. I guess it's not supposed to be your traditional classic horror movie. Not I Know What U Did Last Summer. It keeps you trapped in suspense for the first 45 minutes. Every noise, masked barbie doll, dropped glass, token white girl scream etc. But after that the novelty of it all stopped.
The character's weren't developed so I didn't care who lived or died. Just walked out the theater and don't remember any names. The kills had no point. The love story was the scariest part of all. If you've seen the preview, you've seen the movie. Save your money.
Post Rihanna Syndrome has been cured by Necole Bitchie. No, I'm not going to stalk Necole (not saying she isn't stalkee material). But because of her post on Laura London yesterday. The dimples, the humbleness, the round M&M physique, the weird eye thing. I posted a Cassie vs New New blog back around the Diddy's Angels hype. Needless to say New New had Cassie running crying back to R Les.
I should've took heed then instead of chasing Rih Rih's hot ass. She's still single even though linked to everyone rapper under the sun from Lil' Wayne to Young Neef. Doesn't matter, as long as she isn't claimed. Now your boy only has to worry about ya boy.
Didn't see This Christmas but I know they both were in it. Don't wanna get all into her then he starts spitting "Is That Your Chick" lyrics at me.
My arch nemesis. My dancing dopplehanger. I shall defeat you.
Here's the list of other potentials I had in mind before my Bitchie-Assisted epiphany:
Estelle Megan Good -Vanessa Bryant (I want whatever's driving Kobe) -Vanessa Curry (I want whatever's driving Kobe) -The Jamba Juice Girl on 8th Avenue
We have a lot in common, you and I. I appreciate small victories as well as big ones. They also get me through my day. Dropping 60+ on a garbage team (what up Kevin Durant). Beating court cases (what up Colorado). Shit, I'd be on Rihanna's heels too if it wasn't for Vanessa. Bryant.
But you see I learned you can't do it all alone. Even if you to complain, bitch, curse out your teammates and threaten to trade him. Take 45 shots. Diss the owner.
Whatever you have to do to the right players around you. Do a blog post to get associate bloggers on Thank God I'm Famous. Get your own Paul Gasol. I learned from the Autobiography of Malcolm X that in life to get what you want, you gotta make some noise.
So go on young Kobe Blogant. Lemme see you get 100,000 in a month. Shoot for a million. Post 25 times a day if you want. It's all about the W. Black Mamba over and out.
P.S.
You got it all wrong. It's Lakers over Spurs in 5 and over Detroit in 4.
Started 7:45am New York Penn Station, NJ Transit Platform
Thank God I'm Famous hit 10,000 unique visitors this month. I know it's not a huge Perez Hilton sorta number, but these small victories get me through my day. I'm celebrating by heading to court. Fighting tickets in Newark. If I win, that'll be small victory #2 today! In the meantime, I'll write this blog in my favorite Esquire "What I've Learned" style.
-Mercury is back in retrograde. Hide your laptops. Don't sign any contracts. I explained what this meant before back in the earlier days of my blog. If you're too busy/lazy/ to click on this link, it means everything goes haywire for 3 weeks 3 times a year. I've been going through it this week, as well as most of you. Now you have an explanation. -Whenever life gets crazy/confusing/overwhelming, I throw on When The Pawn... Or Extraordinary Machine. She's like a crazy white girl pyscho Nas with her lyrics. It also makes me think no matter what goes on in my head, there's someone even more nuts. "You fondle my trigger then you blame my gun" pause.
-Beat the unlicensed driver ticket this morning in Newark! Sheriff can't stop the kid. Kid = I. Kidding I'm not. Kid won't stop. Still had a $50 fee for delaying traffic, but no points. I'll eat that. Pause. Next stop is the 6 hour class -My homie Glenny recommended "Conversations With God". She claims it's "The Secret on Steriods". So I hit up the Barnes & Noble on 17th bet Park and Broadway and grabbed it. Book report next week -Later tonight I'll be watching/wikipediaing/youtubing mad Sex & The City stuff. I figure if I'm being dragged to see the movie, might as well know a little more about it. This is what I know now: blah blah blah Carrie blah blah blah Mr. Big blah blah blah old head nympho Samantha blah blah blah HBO -"Never piss off a woman that knows where u live" -Phella of The Famous Firm on 50's Long Island Home Fire. That's gonna be one gangsta kid -Been playing basketball a lot recently. I'm 6'3 but not very good. It's like watching Tim Duncan. I just talk crap until the other person is out of their game. Got two big games we might video tape tomorrow. Might even suit up for The Famous Firm Summer Team in DC -Gonna be in CT and B-More this weekend. Gimmie a shout Sickamore@Thefamousfirm.com
Rich Hil + I are holding Limo's Were Cool IN The 90s Band auditions. We need:
BASS PLAYER GUITARIST KEYBOARD PLAYER DRUMMER
Auditions are being held next week Friday. 90's Babies preferably. 1985 Age Limit. It's going to be the greatest band in the history of greats ever made in life, love and/or Rock-N-Roll
I lived in Atlanta for about a month last summer. Corporate housing courtesy of Atlantic Records. While I was down there, I met with Slim of 112. Mr That's My Jeweler's Job b/k/a Joey IE made the connection.
This song sans Yung Joc was on the original demo. I made a big fuss about it to Asylum, they signed him and now the record is starting to blow up. If anyone has any incredible ideas, video treatments, cross branding opportunities, interview request, parties etc, hit me up about it. He's a old head with a new swag.
Part 1 was incredible. DJ Khaled should turn this into a movie. Him, Fat Joe, Rick Ross, Ace Hood, Plies, Trina, Lil Wayne, Baby, Flo-Rida, The Runners, Cool & Dre and everyone else who's in the new XXL.
-I really underestimated how unmotivated all my peers would be this weekend. So even though I was making a zillion calls, no one else was really receptive to it. It just got me in the middle of BBQs etc. -Ok, I know I really shouldn't be driving. Got side swiped on Willoughby and Flatbush Avenue last night. If you're from Brooklyn, right in front of the car wash. Luckily all I got was a dent, while the other guy (white Taurus full of hoodrats doing hoodrat things with their friends) lost a side mirror. We bought black tape for $2 as a settlement. No police. That was the driving God's telling me to chill out. If you were curious, Kanye's verse on "I Put On" was playing. It's also playing as I write this blog.
-GoOldHead.com launches this week! If you see an old head in action, feel free to send it to me Sickamore@TheFamousFirm.com -Disclaimer: I know it's late, but Ironman really is the shit. That Audi R8 is on my bucket list, right next to 2008 Kobe Finals courtsides. -Unless you were going this hard this weekend, I don't wanna hear it.
Kanye's Bored...Makes Another "Flashing Lights" Vid...I'm Bored..So I Decide To Post It
I can't front. I'm planning this party tomorrow but I'm beyond bored today. Like King Joffie Joe Bored. Like I'm ready to start doing hoodrat things with my friends bored. Like Houston "time-to-gauge-my-eye-out-in-frustration" bored.
Kanye's obviously is just as bored and decided to shoot another "Flashing Lights" video. I dunno who the girl is, nor do I care. You'll bump into her 13 times if you just stroll down West Broadway. I am interested in the naked chick in the hooks though.
This video does look eerily similar to the Colin Munroe stop motion video I saw last year.
Which wouldn't be anything more than a coincidence if Colin didn't remake a "Flashing Lights" video that ended up on Kanye's blog
Now I'm either really really really bored or just reaching. I'll let you decide.
Hillary just put the nail in her own campaigns' coffin. She staying in the race because “We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California.” WTF?!?!?! Is she hoping Obama gets murdered so she can become President? Is this how we're playing these days? Billary is going taking the 50 Cent route on this.
Curtis On Obama
Hillary On Obama:
Obama should record a diss to both of them. Over the Red Cafe "Paper Touchin" beat flippin 50's lyrics. Click Imeed link before reading:
So I came across this picture from Spotlight Live the other night. It was taken during Estelle's performance (who I'll talk more about on Part 3). It showcases a array of bourgeoning potentials. Let's break 'em down singuh by singuh.
Tiffany Evans
Who: R&B Singer signed to Columbia Records (what up Hop)
Pros: 90s Baby Singer + Actress. Has a sexy mentor in Ciara
Cons: '92 Baby. Which means she's jailbait. Plus a possible future golddigger if she's already asking for "Promise Rings"
Cons: From New Orleans Shawty. I like more of the sassy smart mouthed fashionista city girl attitude than the Southern big Beyonce haired bella. Maybe if she went on a Intermix shopping spree or something.
Verdict: She's in the lead out this bunch, but no Rih Rih.
D. Woods
Who: Another one of them chicks from Danity Kane
Pros: Built like a stallion. Graduated from NYU. Def got the stylish Soho thing going for her
Cons: I find all the DK girls a little boring. They don't have enough of an edge; especially compared to Mrs. Brown.
"It is even," forward Rasheed Wallace said. "We don't sit back and say, 'Oh, look. They are undefeated at home,' or 'They didn't win a game on the road.' ... A lot of the teams they played in the postseason and the regular season were scared of them, as far as KG and Ray and Paul. They are good players, but we have good players, also."
-Sheed on last night's game
Hey Boston stans. It's Rasheed again
I told you last time what we're about. Domination. You look at Sportscenter this morning and you'd think Ray Allen's last shining moment would've won you the game. But noooooo. We don't want the fame. We just want the W.
Think about it. You went 7 in two straight series. Once to the Al Horford's ad then to the King and his disciples. YOU NEVER WON A ROAD GAME! YOU'RE SOFT! You think you can handle our arena? Don't you know what kind of things go down at the Palace?
I woke up energized with fresh outlook on life. No Jamba Juice needed. Bored today? Don't watch TV watch me. Let's make it happen. Insert cliche here. Sick Stoute. Here''s my checklist of goals for the next 96 hours.
-1,000 E-Mails -500 Phone Calls -20 Blogs (Including 5 Interviews!) -2 Books + 1 Audio Book -Throw A Legendary Pre-Memorial Day Party Sunday -End GTA 4 (something I didn't even start) -Find New Rihanna
This would be a perfect weekend to hit me up about any and everything. I'm in a Kobe-vs-Spurs-in-the-last-17-and-a-half-minutes-where-he-score-25-of-his-27-pts-to-comeback-from-20-down zones. I like using vacations and holidays to catch up on my competition. And gain further ground on the upstarts. So while y'all are on the beach, calling a cab or backyard BBQing, I'll be here. You're all welcome.
I've been having a pretty uneventful day. Besides the normal business as usual (a bunch of calls/e-mails/famous people making), it's been pretty slow. Especially at the new office, where there's no real creature comforts yet. So I yabadabadoo out the door and decide to take a stroll through Chelsea (pause). On my way I pass other appealing spots like Negril (not that hungry), Starbucks (too crowded) and BBQ's (not in the mood). My eyes light up when I hit Jamba Juice. Mango A Go-Go time!
Before ordering, I ask about wireless internet to check out this attachment. The cute cashier politely directs me to the back, also the area to wait for your drinks. Then she ask about a free power boost. "What's the harm in that?" I think.
Eight minutes later I'm bouncing up, down and around the beige walls.
Spinning in the stool. Checking-every-blog-website-email-text-person-clock-shadow-baby-fire-extinguisher-at-a-crack-heads-pace. The only reason I'm writing this blog is to stop me from jumping in the car to do 130mph on the West Side Highway. It should be illegal to power boost and drive.
Pray that I calm down before I touch the wheel :-/
This blogger claims Chris Paul is the NBA version of Milli Vanilli. Click anywhere for the original link. The question is: does it only apply to Chris or everyone? Because if it's everyone, you shouldn't single out the new Magic/Iverson
I've been going through post dramatic stress disorder over my (stalker-ish) break up with Rihanna. Been having a real tough time 1) dealing with it and 2) finding a replacement.
I was looking at Maxim's "Hot 100" 2008 Party for potential replacements. Didn't really find much solace there either. Someone who was always a perennial front runner, Amerie, is looking more Whitney than wifey.
Jordin Sparks has that whole loveable fat girl Raven Simone type thing going on for her. But it's still a down grade from Rih Rih.
Mariah Carey husband's old jumpoff is still an option, but she just doesn't have that flyness. She's not even the top lightskinneder out there (hey Alicia baby). Plus she isn't looking like she did in Miami this winter. Albeit she was soaking wet in a bikini.
Guess the search goes on while my heart glows in the dark. Sick "Amore".
E Double S O and DJ Sickamore tripled back and dropped E3: E-Day. This is the 3rd straight year E and I have collaborated on a tape. You know I don't host tapes too often. Maybe twice a year? So feel free to download and enjoy.
I just wanted to introduce myself. My name is Rasheed Wallace.
I play for the Detroit Pistons. Sickamore let me post on his blog today, because...well...fuck it I'm famous! People know me. Charles Barkley called me "the most talented player in the history of the NBA". The last time I missed a Eastern Conference Final, Kenny Anderson was your starting point guard. Go do your researchSelltricks fans.
Now I know you have your Celtic pride, but your team are soft. We've Benzino'ed Paula Pierce for years. I'll be guarding Kevin Hairnett all series and he's not scoring more than 18. Period. Even if I have to Anthony Peeler him.
I'm gonna make Jesus Buttlesworth hold the bottom of my shorts all series and look at the hardwood at all times. You know how I get.
I'm writing this email because I don't wanna get your hopes up. Paula can't intimidate us my throwing up his set (B's instead of C's on top of that!) in games.
We're not the Hawks, we're more like the Vultures. Lebron got LUCKY. And when I say lucky, I mean David Stern game to the game in a Witness t-shirt lucky. But this year he rather see the Bitch 3 in rather then our non-fail proof style of play.
I like you Boston fans. I really do. But you better off being coached by Homer Simpson than Doc Rivers.
You're being mislead. Men lie, women lie, Conference Championship appearances don't.
Championships Are Won On The Road (Baltimore Edition)
Kobe wouldn't be able to advance in the playoffs without winning road games. And The Firm won't be able to succeed without expanding. Hence why I'm in Maryland right now. Nicki Minaj has a show (@ Club Taste) and a walk thru @ Babalu Grill. Sakwe, Phella, Mike and I are all starting for the B-More exhibition.
After the shows it's the...bed. I'm crazy tired from catching another flat yesterday and getting it fixed this morning.
Apparently there are no 24 hour low pro tire spots. But we made it happen. Down th NJ Turnpike and across the I-95 fueled by red bulls, chopped turkey sandwiches, sunflower seeds and cracker jacks.
Will stay in town for half the day tomorrow. Gimmie a shout if you're out here.
Name: Sickamore Home: Broooooooooklyn, New York, United States About Me: 23 Year Old Talent Manager + Ageist. Runs ThankGodImFamous, GoOldHead and The Famous Firm. Overall sarcastic yet nice guy See my complete profile
